Please go down

This is gonna be a long day...
10am 181
12pm 222
6pm 332
10pm 172
12am 119
So my numbers today would give my doctor a reason to say my basal is wrong (I'm not defending his suggestion I'm just explaining his initial reaction). I woke up high. I corrected and at lunch, I was STILL HIGH. I decided that I should take 2U extra to account for the 60mg/dL that I have been over. So what do you think happens? I crash real bad and fairly all of a sudden.

How does it feel when you crash? How do you know you're crashing?
Well, for me, crashing and 1-2hr after I eat feel very similar. A little anxious, fidgety and a little kind of tingle at my joints and stomach... kinda like I'm getting ready to run a race. But it goes away eventually. When I crash, it only gets worse. So I'm doing my work in the culture room and I start some really intense stuff when I feel 'normal'. Then I get involved in my work to a point where if I stop, a week's worth of material and time is trashed. I feel like I may crash, but can't really stop and then it hits hard. I barely finish before I really really start sweating and shaking.

And so I overkill and drink too much soda. I eat a couple granola bars to settle my stomach. And by 5pm I'm high as a kite on a windy day. Any doctor that says "Are you sure you were crashing that bad?" or "You shouldn't over do it" is a big fat A-hole. I'm at work. I'm trying to live. My actions before were rationale and the result was not expected. And obviously they don't know what it feels like. Seriously now... how many Type I diabetics out there have a Type I diabetic doctor? Huh? Anyone? How many doctors have woken up my sleep pouring with sweat and staggered to the fridge with blurred vision only to find the only sugar is your expired OJ? How many doctors know how the taste of Coca cola shanges when your BG is low and that sugary foods taste strange when your crashing, but you have to drink it anyway? How many of your doctors know what explosive diarrhea feels like an hour after a bad BG crash?

Truth is it scares the shit out of me and this time the crash was full-on before I treated it. I felt like crap for most of the day and it only got worse. Some freaking sympathy would go a long way. I corrected for the high BG and much later at home (we went to do taxes and grocery shopping) it was still a bit high. I ate, corrected and happily went to bed at 119mg/dL. So now we can see that clearly raising the basal is a very very dangerous idea for myself. Out of the past 5 days, count the number of reading that were near 120mg/dL. All of those times I would have been crashing. Simply put, I have a large day-to-day variation in my bolus needs and doctors have a hard time admitting that to my face. But I'm confident it my self-diagnosis.

I hope I stay lower these next days. I'm tired of feeling like crap.